If you want to ultimately lead a girl down your path of seduction: you have to control the frame, or at least not allow yourself to get sucked into her frame.
In this post, I will critique a random stranger’s text game, talk about whether it was decent or shitty, and how and why he ultimately lost his frame and subsequently got rejected.
By the way, I came across the following screenshots from a girl’s Facebook post. The guy’s texts are in white. The girl’s in green.
Screenshot 1: Now, 1 thing he did very wisely was that he never added a question mark when he asked the girl “you good”. By omitting questions marks whenever you ask a question, it gives the girl the impression that you’re not that sold on her (yet), and that you’re somewhat aloof and not dependent on her reciprocation.
I didn’t like however when he complimented her with, “nice pic”. Way too fucking early to be dishing out compliments; especially to a hot girl who’s accustomed to having tons of guys flooding her with compliments!
Thirdly, I didn’t quite get what he meant when he asked …can u eat”. I guess he meant to say “can I eat”. ❓ Either way, he did make me proud again by electing to not add a question mark after “can u”.
[Guy’s texts in white]
Screenshot 2: Again, he did very good in leaving out the question marks at every point. But in a sense, just as the girl was lost: I was totally lost too as to why he kept asking “can u” instead of “can I”…if that’s what he meant to ask (“can I eat you”). Being ambiguous is a great text game strategy. But you don’t want to be so confusing that it becomes an annoyance.
[Guy’s texts in white]
Screenshot 3: Another thing that I like about what he did is that he discontinued the chat, rather than doubling down when the girl isn’t giving him much feedback. So the chat continued about 5 days later. I didn’t like however, that he contacted her so early. It wasn’t even 7 AM when he re-initiated the text game. This is a huge mistake in that it communicates to the girl that you have no life, and that you were probably up all night waiting for the morning to appear so that you could text her like some desperate loser!
He then made another mistake in text game, by coming off too generic when he asked the girl the same predictable question: “u good”? Never contact a girl asking her if she’s “good, okay, well”, etc! It is too goddamn generic and lame! Additionally, such a question doesn’t spark conversation at all. It only leads to a dead end! The only thing it forces a girl to do is to reply with a 1-worder: a yes…or no…then a dead end.
Another mistake in timing that he made, was that his timing was pretty poor when he decided to say to the girl, “let’s go beach”. A solid line/proposal by the way! But super awful timing! You don’t cold ask a girl to tag along to the beach unless you had already built attraction during the conversation or during a prior conversation. This guy had built not 1 ounce of attraction, yet he’s asking the girl to join him at the beach. In any case; he did phrase it correctly by coming off as assertive by saying “let’s go beach”, instead of asking/begging [only weak men “ask” girls out].
[Guy’s texts in white]
Screenshot 4: Okay, so another key yet common mistake committed was that he questioned the girl about why she cannot make the beach, by asking her “how come”. Again- good job on his part by religiously adhering to my rule of “no question marks”! I would think that this guy had come across an article of mines on omitting questions marks 😉 . Anyway, whenever a girl (whom you’re trying to see) says, “I can’t”; you don’t frikkin’ question it by asking “how come”! If you were to question it, you do so with humor. For instance; he could’ve said, “how come…you don’t know how to swim well can you. Google some swimming lessons and let’s do this whenever the time is right”. That’s how I would’ve handled her saying, “I can’t do the beach”. By doing so, I am not trying to convince her to do the beach with me- then and there- since she already said “can’t”. I’m merely trying to communicate some social intelligence cloaked in humor.
Anyway, the girl apparently ignored his text of “how come”, simply because that was a dumb-fucking thing to say/ask whenever a girl says “I can’t”. Thus, the girl likely had gotten annoyed that someone who doesn’t have compliance from her (the guy), dared question why she cannot come to the beach with him! Everything boils down to compliance when trying to get a girl out. The guy failed to built compliance from the get go as +97% of men fail to do.
Okay, so upon being blown off/ignored, he messaged her 2 days later. Again- I give him mucho mucho credit for being wise here, in that he’s socially aware enough to back off (stop texting) and try again another day (days later). Most guys would’ve doubled down by texting themselves into a bigger hole by sending 4-5 messages asking the girl why isn’t she replying. So props to this guy for exhibiting solid text game in this instance, by deceleration instead of acceleration in texting.
However, he made another mistake by re-opening the girl with a compliment: “nice pic”. Noooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is NOT what you want to do as a restarter (compliment)! What should he be doing at this point? Here’s the deal: the guy obviously wants to meet up with the girl (since he asked her to the beach prior). With that, he should’ve been working 2 angles here: Attraction & Compliance!
Attraction: In other words, instead of being generic as he was with the compliments and boring dialogue, he should’ve been chitchatting with the girl about various things, essentially showing the girl his personality (that he has one) via short DHV stories, etc. By “stories”, I don’t mean a fucking lengthy narration! I mean a tidbit of info about his life(style). He should’ve then engaged the girl and got her to open up. If you were to scan the screenshots just for a quick second, you would realize that the girl wasn’t contributing shit to the dialogue but 1-worders such as: “can’t, sorry to hear, ok, thanks, am good”. That’s it!!!!! That was her contribution to the conversation! And to move from that (no feedback from the target) to then trying to get the girl to agree to meeting up…without compliance: that is a HUGE blunder in game!!!
Compliance: okay, so the guy should’ve been working the attraction angle explained above. Simultaneously, he should’ve been trying to gain compliance from the girl, which would then make her 100 times more receptive to the idea of meeting up with the guy. You want the girl to accept your meet-up proposal. The only way to make this happen is if you make the girl comply to your request! The guy obviously failed to do so!
He then contacted the girl again, about 12 days later. Not a bad idea since I’m a huge advocate of “fall back and come again”. However, he choded himself out by coming back with the same old-generic bullshit: “What’s up”.
[Guy’s texts in white]
Screenshot 5: apparently, the following day, he texted with, “hi sweetheart”. Dude- are you fucking kidding me!!!? “Sweetheart”!!!? You have no compliance from this girl because you never built any, she isn’t attracted to you [your vibe] because you never used any attraction-building material, so logics tell you that you should then double down on the lameness by calling the girl sweetheart!!!? Anyway, huge mistake! Huge goddamn mistake!!!!
“U good”? Another huge mistake since with every instance where he re-initiated texting, he asks the girl the same lame-generic question: “u good”?…to which the answer is a highly predictable “yes”.
As if the situation couldn’t deteriorate further, he then decided to say, “really want to meet u”. Good idea! But it’s built on a foundation of nothingness! The girl has zero fucking incentive to meet up with this guy! So why would she!? And his reply to the girl essentially asking, “why do you want to meet me”, is “because u look sweet”! How lame dude!!!! What a way to enlarge a hot girl’s proverbial ego and make her believe that she’s more desirable than she really is, by telling her you want to meet up because she looks hot…or sweet!!! Chode fucking city!
Again, I want you guys who are reading this to take another quick look at screenshot 5 (above), and notice that the girl isn’t giving any feedback at all besides 1-worders: “am good, hi, yes, really, why, oh…thanks”. Those (1-worders) are usually signs of disinterest [IOD’s] on the girl’s part. The only 2 exceptions are if the girl is extremely busy and cannot reply in detail. Or if she’s the very shy type. Being that I’m friends with the girl on Facebook, I can say with full certainty that this chick is NOT the shy type in the least! Hence, her lack of textual engagement simply boils down to the fact that she isn’t interested in the guy. It is not her fault by the way! She gave him a shot by essentially giving him her phone #! He’s the one blowing it! Not her! He’s responsible for making the girl attracted to him, and wanting to see him!
In any case; you never tell a girl that the reason you want to meet her is because she’s hot, sexy, cute, adorable, nice, etc. Worst/lamest reasons ever! What would I, Kenny, have said?
Me: “Really want to meet u”. Girl: “Really…why so”? Me: “So we could make some cereal box cut-out airplanes and fly them around like 2 giddy kids at the park”. That’s just an example. But humor and unorthodoxy are key! Tell the girl something original that she’s never heard before! This helps to build attraction! Telling the frikkin’ girl that you want to meet her because she looks sweet, doesn’t do a goddamn thing to spark, amplify or build the attraction!
[Guy’s texts in white]
Screenshot 6: Again- I applaud him for religiously sticking to the no-question mark gambit of mines (though this guy appears to do so naturally). At this juncture, the guy had already dropped major points by telling the girl that she looks sweet (upon not having any value to her). Then saying to the girl, “would be nice to taste u”, though that is a good thing to say, it wasn’t good however in this case (it was terrible) because of all the mistakes he made prior. Here’s the thing: whenever you make too many common blunders along the way (as this guy did), nothing you do/say from thenceforth could redeem you. It’s pretty much a 1-shot deal when it comes to making a good impression on a new girl. With all that being said, the girl predictably declined his proposal to eat her. Is it because she genuinely wouldn’t want to be eaten? Of course not! Every girl wants to be treated like a sex object! Too many little mistakes were committed by this guy, so the girl had no choice but to reject him on those basis (that he lacks social intelligence a.k.a. Game).
He then made another blunder, which he’d committed previously, by asking the girl, “why not”, upon her declining to meet up. If a girl says “it won’t happen”, “not interested”, “I can’t make it”, etc. don’t respond by asking “why not”? By doing so, you are only allowing yourself to feed into her negative framing of things. You are allowing her to steer and steal the show essentially. The guy then gets all defensive because the girl said “not interested”. Remind you; she didn’t mean that she isn’t interested in the guy altogether. She simply meant that she isn’t interested in having him taste her. But the guy misinterpreted that to mean that the girl isn’t interested in him at all.
[Guy’s texts in white]
Screenshots 7 & 8: the guy then feeds/falls into her frame and began battling about a trivial matter of why nots. At this point, along with going full-on defensive mode, the guy sensing that his chances were undoubtedly slipping away, goes for the hail mary- a last hurrah- with: “I want to give you a good fuck”! Now- that is not a terrible thing to say (contrary to popular belief). After all, you’ve seen me get straight to the point on countless occasions with countless women,without ever getting a negative reaction. Why is that? I would’ve done everything correctly up until that point of going hard sexually. The girl would’ve been attracted to my vibe by then. Hence her reaction would’ve communicated this (that she’s attracted). Having struck out at every juncture prior, the guy had no chance. The conversation eventually turned into a frame battle (which the girl was winning hands down). By then, the frame had been lost and the girl finally pounds some nails into the coffin. Just so you know; I personally could’ve flipped that, by attracting the girl through drama and conflict…which is 1 of my favorite routines by the way.
Okay, so what happened?
Apart from my text-by-text breakdown: what happened, and why did this guy fail so miserably?
Before I give my closing analysis, I want to point out something just to put things into perspective here: this guy’s game is ultra-common [“Game” for lack of a better word]!
As an outside observer, you are probably going: “But Kenny…I text girls the same way as this guy does. I didn’t know it was that bad”!
Well- it is that fucking bad…however common!
Bad game is common game. This is why a minuscule number of men are having sex with every girl out there who’s sexually active.
Guys who are good with women are few and in between.
At the end of the day, if a girl gives you her phone number, granted that chicks are in the habit of giving their numbers away like its going out of style, you can essentially interpret that to mean that she has some interest in you (though this is only the case in 50% of the cases).
With that, it is up to you as the guy to finagle that into something tangible…such as a date or sex.
Although this guy had the perfect idea of how to game and seduce a girl through text, he did everything with poor timing.
Additionally, he made dozens of fundamental errors such as:
•Failure to build any attraction whatsoever
•Failure to gain compliance from the girl
•Failure to give the girl a reason to want to meet up (there must be an incentive for her besides sex)
•Failure to even game the girl at all
The list of failures is extensive.
At no point during his text game did he ever attempt to make the girl laugh or send an LOL.
He totally neglected to humor the fucking girl! Instead, he went from 0 to 100 in 1 swoop: “hi my name is Paul…now let’s meet up”.
In order to successfully go from introduction to meetup, the girl will have had to at least been keen on you (and or interested) prior to this.
For instance, I game lots of girls over Facebook. If I were to then go for a phone number- chances are- the girl(s) would’ve already been privy to my style, personality, desires, intentions, likes, dislikes, etc. Hence, upon grabbing her phone #, I would’ve been able to go from 0 to 100 ASAP by cold saying to the girl; “Let’s meet up”.
Nevertheless, the guy apparently went from having zero value or notoriety to the girl, to then trying to score a meetup.
Terrible idea in game!
In a neat nutshell, all he had to have done was to show some personality: wits, humor, charms, conversational skills, vibing, etc.
Those are the things which 98% of you guys fail to communicate. Instead, you go from “hi” to “can we go out”, like it’s a sprint to the finish line or something.
If you want to learn good text-game, and you haven’t already purchased my Facebook pickup products, then I implore you to do so A-Fucking-SAP!
If reading isn’t your favorite modus of learning game, you can always schedule a half-hour, or an hour Skype session with me (or Facebook Messenger if you don’t have Skype), at the links below.