Arguably the most popular saying in the pick-up community: “Persistence is king“.
The quote is pretty much self-explanatory: those who persist are of a higher caliber…and they ultimately get the girl.
We already know that 98% of the problems guys are having when it comes to picking up women, are persistence related.
Not only that the vast majority of men don’t persist. But of those who do muster the cojones to persist, they do it all wrong. So the problem is 2-pronged.
Here’s another word of advise before I get into the field report:
When a girl refuses to give you her phone number, instead of viewing it as a rejection- look at it this way- she isn’t ready yet. She isn’t warmed to the task of giving me her # yet.
What a fucking reframe, isn’t it!?
That’s what I say to myself whenever a girl plays extra hard-to-get and doesn’t cough up the digits: she’s isn’t ready yet. Not that she doesn’t like me, but she isn’t warm enough yet to give me the digits.
Most guys get all dejected and take on the wrong frame, believing to themselves that the girl doesn’t like them and she’s repulsed by them.
Anyway, so this evening, I ran into an HB7 whom I tried to pick up (#-close/get her phone number). Though we had a spirited interaction the first time we met on the avenue, the hurdles were just too high and time was too stringent for a successful pull. So I didn’t manage to get her phone number.
Again- I didn’t take it as a rejection that she shied away from giving me the digits.
I reframed it in the positive: “there’s always a next time”.
Here’s the 1 upside to living in a small town or gaming girls who live in your general vicinity:
You are bound to bump into them again at some point.
As someone who lived in the metropolis of New York City his entire life, you weren’t likely to run into a girl whom you came across on a prior occasion.
The city is just too sprawling for that to happen. So it is literally a 1-shot only opportunity to get that particular girl or you lose her for good.
Now that I live on an island- essentially a small city you can say- the chances of bumping into a girl whom you’d met prior, is likely.
About 3 weeks ago, not having been able to get this HB7’s number [she just wasn’t ready for that investment], I hoped with all my might to see her again real soon. I was real optimistic because she lives in my immediate area.
Days went by; no show.
A week went by; still hadn’t seen her.
Two weeks: no girl.
Two and a half weeks go by, I virtually erased from my mind the thought of ever seeing her again.
Today (Thursday) made week #3.
Walking up the avenue, I spotted a girl who resembles the HB7.
“Oh shit! It is her”!
She laughs as she seen me.
The first time I cold approached her 3 weeks back, she promised that if we were to meet again, she would give me her phone number.
She herself I guess didn’t count on seeing me again either.
When she did again this evening, she had to laugh at the coincidence that she wasn’t quite banking on.
Me: “Wow, it’s been 3 whole weeks”! 😆
Girl: “Yea…I know. You see…that wasn’t that long”.
Me: “Wasn’t long? I felt like I was gonna die not seeing you again. So…you remember your little promise”?
Me: “But nothing. Don’t think I’m gonna wait another 3 weeks to get your number. This shit is fucking torture”!
Of course I was exaggerating and being humorous (which is the sexiest quality a man could have).
Girl: “Why is it torture”?
Me: “BTW, we didn’t get to exchange names last time. What’s your name”?
Girl: “Call me anything”. 🙂
Again guys; this was humor and banter back and forth. Never take it to heart when a girl does this. It is almost always banter and fun. But most guys- stupid guys- would interpret this to mean that the girl is about head games and shit, and isn’t interested.
Me: “So…Ms Anything, you’re sexy as fuck. I can’t just let you go this time”.
Girl: “Wow! Aren’t you forward”!
Me: “I go after what I want. I seen you, wanted you…now I’m here”.
Girl: “Wow. That’s confident”.
Me: “Not tryna sound all cocky or anything but I fucking want you and will have you”.
Girl: “Wow! Forward again”.
Me: “Give me your number. Stick to your promise”.
Girl: “Really? That’s kinda cocky”.
Me: “Listen, I don’t wanna be on this corner all evening chatting. For all I know, your boyfriend may pull up any minute”.
Girl: “Glad that you know. He’s meeting me at this intersection in a few”.
Me: “So…your #”.
Girl: “Why should I give it to you”?
Me: “You think I’m the type to text you and call you @ 4 AM like these weirdos do”?
Girl: “Never know. You might”.
Me: “Listen, don’t play me like that. I know how to operate on cue”.
Girl: “What do you mean”?
Me: “I won’t text you until you give me a signal”.
Girl: “But I do have a boyfriend. Why would you want to text me and it may cause trouble”?
Me: “That’s why I said I work off of your cue. Once you text me and let me know it is safe to text because he’s not around, that’s the only time I would message you. I’m not dumb”.
She walks off but I purse in a non-needy and non-stalkerish fashion.
Girl: “How I know you’re not the stalker type”?
Me: “Listen, I seen you and I want you. You’re sexy and I don’t want to be a stalker”.
Girl: “What do you want from me exactly”?
Me: “You’re sexy…that says it all. It’s 72…what”?
Note: when grabbing a # from a girl who’s being non-complaint, there’s a little psychological trick I like to use…which is to read out some digits as if she’s already giving me her #.
It’s subtle yet powerful on a psychological level.
Once the other person already sees you committing to the act (of reading out her number), they are likely to be swayed into that direction.
The girl hesitates a bit but I kept on subtly yet confidently nudging her in the direction of giving up the digits…so she did.
At the end of the day, this was persistence without being needy and desperate.
I knew that the girl wanted to give me her number but was hesitant for various reasons (perhaps her BF is the type to search her phone, etc).
In light of that, I didn’t allow her prior hesitancy, and her hesitancy on this occasion, to make me lose sight of what I wanted.
I’m well aware that chicks play hard-to-get, not because they don’t like the guy, but often times because they do like the guy, but aren’t sure whether he likes them. So playing hard-to-get is generally a girl’s way of discovering whether the guy is sincere or just fucking around.
By not persisting, the girl is forced to come to the conclusion that the guy wasn’t serious about her after all.
This is why you must persist until the bitter-fucking end!
You must show the girl that you are serious about wanting her and wanting her number in order to facilitate the acquaintance process.