The debate on looks have got to be the most mulled about in the dating world over the past 10 years.
If you’re privy to following the mainstream media and Hollywood, then it’s quite natural that you would hold the opinion that looks do matter greatly, and if you happen to have not been blessed with GQ looks at birth, then you don’t deserve a certain caliber of women in society.
In brute language: ugly men shouldn’t expect to date hot women.
In our ignorance as men; we accept this false reality without daring to test its credibility.
Hence, it would’ve appeared to us that women are really that shallow and that the looks paradigm has been verified.
This is NOT the case!
Guys who believe that looks matter, are usually the ones who can’t get laid to save their life!
In order to rationalize their failure to attract women, using “lack of good looks” is seen as an acceptable cop out.
For clarity sake here, when we think of looks, we factor in solely the physical composition and makeup of a person’s appearance: skin tone, complexion, build, nose, eyes, hair, cheeks, overall facial structure, teeth alignment, etc.
Whenever someone says “Looks”, he/she is referring to those physical attributes, and not to someone’s clothing, attire, style, and not necessarily to his or her fashion sense.
Looks are purely what you were born with and cannot reconfigure…unless through reconstructive surgery of course.
As for the way men see women, looks commonly include: breast size, butt, cuteness, weight, hair color, facial blemishes and lack therefore…just to name a few things.
Now, given those factors, what the media and western society have managed to crammed down our brains, is that if a guy doesn’t fit a specific mold of what beauty is- for instance, his nose is too long or too broad- then he is deemed less attractive and should expect a more difficult path to dating and women.
Ninety-five percent of us have eaten that up: hook, line and fucking sinker!
As a caveat here; this is a western problem as most looks-based issues in dating are!
Western media are so corrupt that they have managed to convince men that in order to become date-able, they must have good looks, money, cars, finest clothes and a myriad of other material possessions.
In Eastern societies where the media don’t try to dictate who is date-worthy and who is not, looks are rarely ever a fucking factor in the dating process!
Thus it is the norm in those parts to see so-called ugly guys toting beautiful lasses on their arms.
Now, the hidden beauty in this, in spite of Hollywood’s programming of our minds, is that women inherently understand that a guy’s physical composition- his looks- don’t mean shit!
Yes- as shallow as women are- something deep within forces them to realize that a guy’s personality has more stock than his outer appearance…as far as the things he cannot change without cosmetic distortion.
However, due to societal influence [and the media], she is bamboozled into believing that looks have more value than a guy’s personality, character and ability to lead and cooperate in the production of healthy offspring.
This cluster-fuck leads to everything from dead-beat-dad-ism, fatherless kids, broken homes to death even.
Most relationships [and marriages] in the western hemisphere fail ultimately because of this: women choosing to date men based on their [men’s] looks!
She turns a blind fucking eye to his blatant in-abilities and plethora of red flags being tossed about screaming for attention, solely to put square attention on the guy’s looks!
Weeks later, she gets fucked over, knocked up, dumped and now has to resort to chasing this guy whom she didn’t have squat in common with from the get-go.
Her poor judgment and decision making were facilitated by the media, Hollywood and society.
Conversely, when you take note of the divorce rate in Eastern societies, it is astronomically lower in comparison to the west!
On 1 hand: you have a society that isn’t looks based.
On another: you have western societies which are TOTALLY looks based!
Hence the not-so-hidden reason of our relationship failures.
Ok, so to the original question: “Do looks matter”?
The not-so-unambiguous answer is: They only appear to matter.
As a guy who doesn’t have movie-star looks going for himself- just as I don’t- what is our recourse…if any?
I’m gonna share with you the magic pill that you’ve been in dire need of your entire life!
If you aren’t a good-looking guy and you still want to enjoy the luxury of banging hot pussy of hot women, then you have to firstly believe with all certainty that looks don’t matter!
That is the magic bullet here!
You have to first alter your thinking, mindset and your perception of what women want, think and to what they respond.
It’s akin to the old cliche of alcohol and drug rehabilitation: one has to first admit that there’s a problem in order to rectify the problem.
The problem here isn’t that looks matter.
It is your belief that looks matter and that you don’t have good enough looks to compete with so-called good-looking guys.
This includes approaching women from a different frame/disposition than
what you’re accustomed to.
Take me for instance. Not what society would considers stellar in the looks department.
Does this deter me from pulling hot ass?
Of course not!
I realize- or at least believe to myself- that looks don’t matter.
Therefore, with such thinking, it enables me to seduce women on a subconscious level while bypassing their consciousness which has been programmed to focus on looks and not vibe.
Whenever I approach new girls on the streets, I focus on my vibe and vibing and not on trying to present myself as Mr Handsome!
If you play into a girl’s looks programming, she will judge you on looks!
If you play up your fun and interesting personality and vibe; she will judge you based on that!
Now, do looks matter?
Only if you make them matter!