One things you’ll come to know about being in a traditional-monogamous relationship, is that the woman will almost actively seek to weaken you as a man.
As some seduction gurus have stated [such as RSD Owen], this isn’t necessarily done consciously. But women will eat away at your soul like a parasite until you eventually cave…or get dragged into an asylum.
As written in classic pickup literature, this “eating-away at the man’s soul”, is a woman’s way in taming her man- an Alpha-Male- in an attempt to reduce him to a needy Beta without a soul.
It is also a dichotomy in and of itself because:
Every woman would like a strong man as her significant other in whom she can brag to others about [she wouldn’t dare brag about having a pussy for a boyfriend].
However, when she does get this strong man, she will seek to eat away at him and drain his strength like a dying battery rendered disable.
If the girlfriend does succeed in breaking the man down [taming him], logics would have it that she will stay with this guy albeit rendered weakened.
Not quite so at all!
She will then dump the now tamed boyfriend whom she’d worked overtime to break, to then get another boyfriend and perpetuate the cycle of Beta-ization until she becomes too old to tango, then has to settle for a Beta-Male provider from scratch.
Do all women attempt to ruin their man this way?
I would say “hell yea”!
It is in the woman’s gender role to do so [cause the man to fall].
Most boyfriends and husbands are actually broken, weakened, tamed and whipped individuals who are nowhere like they were at the inception of the relationship.
Why do these relationships still exist even after the man has been neutered and rendered spineless?
Simply because the woman is allotted the best of both worlds and she gets her cake and eats it too.
She will keep the broken man around as her provider boyfriend who takes care of her, while seizing the liberty to screw around behind his back with guys who were once upon a time- like her boyfriend (strong, dominant and Alpha).
Listen- I’ve been in an LTR (Long-Term Relationship) for the past 5 years and change.
My girlfriend drives me nuts most of the time.
She pushes my buttons daily…and almost on purpose.
Hence, I speak from having 1st-hand and current knowledge as to how women in relationships operate and the little things they do in order to drive their man up the wall.
Nit-picking is the least. But that also is a great example of a girl’s attempt to reduce her man to a pile of useless rubble by psychologically wearing him down.
Nagging and making a big deal out of little shit, is quite common also.
Blowing things out of proportion just to get you [the boyfriend] to react and become bogged down into her frame, is also quite common.
This begs the question: are women doing these things consciously and on purpose?
Whenever a girl nags about the most insignificant shit under the sun that the guy might have done; is she conscious of what she’s doing, or this is so visceral and auto-piloted that it operates on a sub-conscious level?
Great question to which only women should have the answers.
I’ve asked my girlfriend this question also:
“Are you aware of the shit you do and the buttons you push”?
The answer is always the same:
“I’m not pushing any buttons”
“What are you talking about”
“I don’t see it as blowing things out of proportion”
Judging from the most standardized responses I get: logics would have it that women are NOT aware of their little-nefarious attempts at destroying a man’s soul and his peace of mind.
However, since women aren’t at all the best source of information as to why they behave the way they do, it is highly likely that women are aware of their subtle diggings and attempts at driving men crazy.
In the Pick-Up Community, we have a classic saying in relation to the women we meet and hook up with:
“Always leave her better than you met her”
In other words, pickup isn’t about ruining a woman’s self-esteem, self-worth or value.
In the end game: we strive to leave the woman better off than we met her [through a great experience].
With women however, they actually do the complete opposite where they meet a decent guy, but over time and throughout the course of the relationship, they leave the guy worse off than he was when they first met.
A woman will rather ruin you on every level, before letting you go with your sanity intact.
Most relationships, as you would’ve surmised, do NOT end cordially neither mutually.
Either 1 party gets totally fucked out of their mind. Or both do.
Most often though, and this’ what I see on the ground with most couples, the guy is almost always the one left out to dry with his value sapped and manhood crushed to a pile of rubble.
Men generally have zero support after a breakup.
Either we keep our pain (of breaking up) to ourselves [the machismo effect], or we express it online through such media as PUA and relationship forums, where guys go in search of tips on how to get their ex-girlfriend back, or simply to blow off some steam.
Women on the other hand, have all the support they can ever ask for upon a breakup.
They have girlfriends giving solace, orbiter-male friends buying cheer-up gifts, parents, mothers, teachers, online friends, etc. offering support.
Women aren’t lacking in the least of shoulders to cry on whenever down and out from a fresh breakup.
Shit- her BFF’s may even throw a “fuck him” get-together sleep-over to commemorate the breakup while sticking it to the man whom she’d broken up with!
Her many support will quickly re-inflate her self-worth and esteem back to a buoyant state.
The man on the other hand, who was likely the dumpee, enjoys no such comfort of solace.
Now, why is all this so?
Why are women actively seeking to rip the souls out of the men whom they profess to love?
One such reason: FEAR of loss.
Fear that the guy/boyfriend will actually leave her for another gal.
Thus, it is in her best interest to make the guy un-dateable by essentially ruining him on every conceivable level.
It is a classic case of the cliche:
“If I can’t have him; then no one else can”.
Therefore, in an attempt to keep her boyfriend off of the dating market and away from other preys (i.e. women), she will elect to fuck him up psychologically, in hopes to render him incapable of attracting other women…and this actually works!
Hence, the guy [the dumped] ends up thinking that all women are cold-evil bitches without an ounce of care in the world!
In the most recent video I’d posted of RSD Tyler, he made a great point about how a woman or a wife, will actually (unintentionally) encourage her husband to remain the way he is because she loves him the way he is.
Months and years go by, the husband being complacent, lazy and simply lacking understanding of how women operate, allows himself to get fat and sloppy, neglected his fitness, weight and so forth, to then get slapped with a divorce from his wife…the same one who’d encouraged him to remain dormant and neglect his shit in the first place.
In the meantime, seeing her husband as unsightly and un-sexy, she begins to fuck some other guy (or guys) behind his back just to drive the stake a bit deeper into her husband’s soul.
Now she’s getting fucked by Ricardo, the undocumented lawnmower-guy who doesn’t do shit for her besides providing the cock on the side since her husband is now deemed unsightly in her eyes.
Cold but very common.
Ironically, most men cannot see this sucking of value and their life slipping away as a result of their girlfriend or wife’s constant poking, nagging and nit-picking.
As a man with confidence, competence and wherewithal about yourself, if you’re not careful, you may very well find yourself in a position, months or years down the line, where all those great qualities you once possessed prior to the relationship, have now been depleted and eaten away by the vulture-like nature of the modern-day woman called your girlfriend.
She will sap your confidence, swagger, smoothness, know-how and your sex-worthiness within 1 swoop.
That is the risk you take whenever venturing into a monogamous relationship or a marriage.
Your spouse, the one who supposedly loves you, will do her best to break you down emotionally, psychologically and as a result- physically.
If you aren’t aware of this crass-covert operation, you’ll find yourself in such a state whereas you aren’t as confident and smooth with other women as you ought to be.
You aren’t as confident in general.
You don’t move around the same as you used to…and I mean this physically also, whereas your strides and movements become less confident and more restricted as you’re being weighted down with all the bullshit handed to you on a platter by your girlfriend or wife.
Furthermore, every guy who’s been in a relationship and is au-fait to pickup literature, will have been familiar with the ‘Rust factor’.
That is: relationships make a guy rusty.
The thing is, it isn’t being in a relationship in and of itself that makes a guy’s social skills and game rusty.
You can still game other women while in an LTR (Long-Term Relationship)…as I’ve been doing all these years (which will keep rust at bay).
However, the real reason why men experience ‘rust’ while in a relationship and after the subsequent severing, is due to their soul and manhood being annihilated by the girlfriend’s crafty shenanigans designed to kill the man slowly.
With your confidence sapped and sacked, you’ll mistaken such a state as being ‘rust’, when in reality, your confidence, attraction and game have been stripped away from you.
Upon severance of a relationship, the guy is usually the one to emerge Demoralized and Downtrodden.
Trying to play the field and meet new women in such a state of demoralization and non-confidence, the results are usually negative, and are blamed on ‘rust’, instead of the true culprit at large, which is that the guy had been battered down psychologically by his ex-significant other.
Now, how does a guy go about avoiding all this or curtailing its effects after they have taken place?
Firstly, it requires recognition.
Recognizing the signs of if and when your girlfriend or wife has been attempting to emasculate you.
Once you can confirm this as true [via her nagging, nit-picking, etc], your job will have been 80% handled…but it firstly takes recognizing that there’s a problem in order to fix it.
Like I said earlier guys, I’ve been in a 5 year relationship, and I am in no way exempt from being cut down by my girlfriend.
Being a dominant Alpha-Male, doesn’t mean that she won’t test you, push you and egg you on in order that you fall.
It’s akin to slaying a fucking giant!
If she can succeed at bringing down Goliath (i.e. her Alpha boyfriend), how much more self-validation would she derive from that, opposed to bringing down a 4’0 midget with the confidence of a mouse!?
Hence, the greater the boyfriend (in value, worth and perception); the greater the kill.
Since I’m not immune here, I constantly get sucked and suckered into frame battles by my girlfriend over bullshit.
Frame battles come in the form of: she disrespects, wastes my time, purposely picks fights, over-blows situations, antagonizes altercations, etc.
For example (blatant disregard for my time):
Me: “Hey babes, order me a chicken pizza while you’re still at the pizzaria”.
GF: “Ok no problem”.
Twenty-five minutes later:
Me: “Wow, that’s taking kinda long”.
GF: “They didn’t have any chicken pizza”.
Me: “Ok…so it took you almost half an hour to tell me and I’m here staving?…so did you order something else instead”?
GF: “I didn’t order anything else because I didn’t know what you would want”.
My ears are fuming at this point!
Me: “Ok but quick question. Did it ever occur to you to simply text or call me and tell me that they didn’t have chicken pizza so I can get something else”?
GF: “I was too busy texting and it slipped my mind”.
That’s just a classic example of where my girlfriend would do shit, or neglect to do shit (seemingly on purpose), just to fucking tick me off and to ruin my seemingly-good spirit.
Subsequently, I get sucked into her frame and a pointless argument ensues (which is what she wants) over something that is elementary in nature.
Little incidents and fuck-ups like those, sap the life out of a guy and subsequently lower his state from a jolly person to someone on the edge.
Over time, this will fuck with you even more!
I’ve had 5 years of this shit. And this is probably the reason my hair has been falling out gradually! 😉
The only ways I see to avoid getting sucked into a woman’s negative frame (from my experience- 5 year’s worth):
1.) To simply do everything for myself.
2.) Ignore the shit out of any fuck-ups that may surface.
Make no mistakes about it: this isn’t exclusive at all to my girlfriend.
Every woman operates this way.
It might not be in the same situations and contexts as my girlfriend. But those inconsistencies and fuck-ups will rear their heads in other areas and circumstances which will drive the guy up the fucking wall [that’s if he hasn’t been broken yet]!!!
The perfect girlfriend does not exist.
The closet thing to a perfect girlfriend, is one gagged and bound.
Hence, whenever you enter into a relationship (or get sucked in as is mostly the case), a woman’s attempt to eat away at your happiness, will be unavoidable.
Does your girlfriend or wife care about seeing you happy?
Only if ‘Happy’ is in the context of you being Beta-ized, weakened and neutered like an animal.
Sadly enough, that is actually the case in most marriages and relationships: the guy has gotten his balls cut off from underneath him, and reduced to a harmless, spineless game-less man-child.
He’ll then get cheated on, dumped and find himself religiously browsing the internet through the following-search terms:
“How to win my ex back”
“I’ve been dumped”
“My girlfriend left me”
He’ll then stumbled upon my website and beg for the magic pill to getting his -ex back.
Do you see where the problem lies here?
Why should a sane man, spend a second of his time trying to get back with a woman who obviously doesn’t value him as someone of worth?
What would fucking change if Kenny shares with him some magic tips and he does manage to win his -ex back?
He’ll be the same Beta-Male provider boyfriend as he was before.
He’ll get used again, abused again and dumped again!
Therefore, my parting advice to any guy who finds himself in such precarious situation, is to examine where it all went wrong.
Recognized that his girlfriend (or -ex) has ruined him as a man, and partly due to his own ignorance of women, he facilitated this to happen.
Also, the ‘remedial fix’ is NOT to kill yourself trying to get back with the girl who had fucked you over.
This absurd action is akin to jumping back into a burning building after the fire had already totally consumed your property and almost toasted you to a crisp…yet you still want to jump back into the inferno of a burning building like a fucking idiot!
When put in such a context, you readily realize how ridiculous it is to try to get back with a girl who’d broken up with you…especially when you’re not at fault of anything egregious.
What you can do though, either while still in the relationship and haven’t been dumped yet – in order to save yourself (or the relationship)- is to avoid being worn down any further by not allowing yourself to be sucked into your girlfriend’s petty-negative frames via instigated fights.
Every now and then, a woman needs a good argument as it keeps her psychologically and emotionally stimulated. So you don’t want to shy away from every fight or else she’ll deem you a weakling pussy who cannot stand up for himself neither defend his positions.
However, argue and fight when the situation warrants it.
If it’s petty, pointless and overblown; simply ignore her or ignore it!
The problem with Betas (most guys) is that they’re so adverse to putting women in check verbally (and physically), that women become bored with the lack of stimulation from being with a non-dominant and docile man, and everything goes South from there.
There’s a reason why women are addicted besides themselves to soap opera: the fucking Drama!
Drama entails arguments, fights and falling outs.
It keeps women enthralled and engaged.
Every now and then, you should dump your girlfriend or flirt with other girls in her presence just to give her that psychological drama which she fucking craves!
It is very likely that your girlfriend had dumped you simply because you elected to NOT give her that soap-opera drama PERIODICALLY…and whenever the situation warrants it.
Pick your spots and argue when necessary, like on matters of principle, respect and whenever she undermines your manhood and your position as the man in the relationship.
You should never allow your girlfriend or wife to get away with (flagrant) disrespect, or she will continue to violate your manhood until you become the proverbial bitch in the relationship.
However, in situations outside of that: simply don’t allow yourself to be dragged into frame battles over who left the toilet-seat up or why is your phone on silent mode or vibrate.
Simply give her the straight-forward reason and ignore the situation afterwards, or else she will tear you down emotionally and psychologically if you happen to engage her on her level within her frame.
To backtrack a bit and shed some well-needed light on the previous point of “drama”, you have to periodically keep your girlfriend on edge and enthralled by periodically doing something dramatic!
Then after a week or so; have makeup sex and apologize for treating her so badly!
Give her that fucking soap opera man!!!
When she watches soap, she’s being bombarded with these main themes:
“Jon dumps Alice”
“Jon cheats on Alice”
“Jon has an affair with Jane”
“Jon and Alice gets into fight over Jane”
“Jon apologizes to Alice for walking out on her and they have make-up sex”
That is the common theme to every soap opera!
That is how I keep my girlfriend in check whenever her shit goes too far.
However, since most men are too scared to lose their girlfriend, such actions won’t even be considered.
Hence, the girlfriend retains the power and the upper hand in the relationship while she continue to rip the soul out of the boyfriend by fucking another guy behind his back.