Comfort, Comfort, Comfort…or lack thereof
In Pickup/Seduction, there’s a critical phase dubbed “Comfort/Rapport”.
It’s a juncture within the interaction where the seductionist seek to gain “Comfort” in making the girl comfortable by connecting with her via “Rapport/Comfort” building.
The more time you spend with a woman: the greater the chance of making her comfortable with you and around you.
However, there’s a catch 22 in that making the girl too comfortable with you (in a non-sexual way), she will have deemed you as just a shoulder to lean on and likely to friendzone you.
Hence, you always want to err on the side of less comfort by not connecting with her too strongly.
Anyway, so yesterday evening [Thursday] while taking care of some business, I came across a nice piece of ass so I picked her up via my usual Same-Night Lay [SNL] method of getting laid quick.
Fast forward a ton, I got her to my apartment around 8:30 PM but she was super nervous and sitting at the edge of the bed…as expected.
Tidbit: always ensure that the only seating available is on the bed. So make sure to pile boxes and shit on the sofas and chairs so she has no choice but to sit on the bed. 😈
After some minutes, she became super comfortable as she showed me some funny videos which she’d downloaded to her Android phone.
At 1 point, she said to me that I was lying too close to her.
I viewed that as some kinda test of sorts so I busted on her for wanting me to slide over. After a while, I did move over a bit. I just didn’t want her to think that I was going to move on her request, so that’s why it’s good to wait few seconds so that it looks as though you moved on your own volition and not because she said so.
All the while, I was lying down while she sat at the edge of the bed so I said to her:
“Why don’t you get a bit comfortable and stop being so tense. It’s not like I’m gonna try to fuck you”.
Girl: “Lol I am comfortable”.
Then she scoots up further on the bed to lie down a bit.
After about an hour and a half of constant objections towards my attempts at getting intimate with her, I lost interest in the bang altogether and froze her out.
In pickup jargon, that means to ignore her. So I rolled over with my back turned to her which prodded her to engage me:
Girl: “What’s the matter”?
I was totally not trying to sit up all night with this chick looking through photos and watching some stupid-ass videos.
Worst of all; she smokes cigarettes!
I can’t fucking stand women who smoke! 😦
After a while, she said she had to get going because her friend might get worried [she’s staying with a friend].
She left about 10:30 (from being in my place since 8:30) and I dozed off immediately after.
At 12 AM sharp, I was awakened by my iPhone. 3 whatsapp messages had come in from the girl [actual screenshot snippet below]:
“Why you taking so long to respond”?
I was so not interested in what she had to say…but I replied anyway.
“I’m not sleep. Just listening some music”.
Girl: “Ok well…can I come back over”?
At this point, I’m like “WTF”- while doing back flips at another shop at banging this sexy girl.
Me: “Whatever! If you wanna come by again it’s up to you”.
Girl: “What’s the attitude for”?
Me: “Just a bit tired and sleepy”
Girl: “Well are you gonna leave the door open for me since you might fall asleep”?
Me: “I guess”
I kept the door locked however as I really didn’t believe she would come back over…a chick whom I’d just met that same night.
I dozed off and was awakened by a rattling of the doorknob and light knocks on the window of the studio apartment.
It was about 1 AM, I let her in, went back to lie down as if she wasn’t there.
She kicked off her shoes and grabbed the other side of the bed:
Girl: “Let’s watch some videos”.
Me: “What!? It’s after 1 and I’m sleepy”.
Girl: “Whateva Kenny”!
We stood up and watched some videos on Youtube for a bit. She seemed mighty comfortable in my bed.
I said to her:
“Why are you all the way over there in the corner”?
Girl: “Because it’s comfortable here”
Me: “Well you can dress over”
She didn’t scoot over closer to me so I moved closer to her instead.
Girl: “Why are you so close”?
I ignored her with my back turned towards her.
I asked her if she was cold since it was pretty breezy that night. She said “no”.
Me: “Well I’m cold as hell”. Come cuddle me from behind”.
Me: “So not fun”
After a while, I put my hand on her shoulder but she shrugged it off.
I chilled back to try again as expected.
Every attempt to establish touch was denied: whether it be touching her knees, elbows, shoulders, hair, back, and other such non-sexual regions of the bod.
In my head I’m saying, “You came back here for this shit!? Why didn’t you just stay home!? You took a cab all the way here…for what”?
I dozed off, woke up, she was out cold so I tried to get her attention by coughing loudly.
She turned and then I threw my arm around her shoulder as if unconscious- but she rejected that move also by shrugging away my arm.
This chic can’t be serious!?
In my apartment? My bed!?
Then I immediately afterwards flashed back to an old post of mines: “2 hidden reasons why she didn’t give it up”.
Either she’s on her menstrual, or hasn’t shaven her pussy in a while.
Third possible reason of rejecting intimacy could simple come down to she not wanting to fuck me.
Plain and simple.
However, my hunched told me that she was either on her period or was unkempt downstairs.
Just to bring something else to your attention: the average girl doesn’t wake up, go about her usual business and expect to be taken home by a random stranger…to fuck!
That just doesn’t register on her daily program.
Therefore, often times when I pick up girls for possible One-Night Stand sex, they are usually shell shocked that such a unpredictable thing could’ve happened…going home with a complete stranger within 30 minutes of meeting.
Hardly any guy is out there looking to take girls home the same night, so the reality of this, usually catches women completely off guard.
Ok, so this begs the question though: Why the fuck would you come back over to my place to sleep in my bed if you didn’t expect intimacy!?
Of course the underlying reason for this is simple:
Hence, even if a girl doesn’t want to fuck, she will often times make gestures and moves which indicate otherwise.
Anyway, I was faced with 2 choices:
1.) Either kick her out
2.) Let her sleep
As much of an asshole I can be, I called it a night and allowed her to stay untouched.
Perhaps I’ll get the lay over the weekend. ❓
Also, I don’t feel that it came down to a lack of comfort in this case although lack of comfort is usually the culprit for this sorta situation.
I woke up at 6 AM to meet her sitting up in bed on her phone and staring at the rose mural on the wall so I took a few shots just for the fuck of it.