Days ago, I was social vibing with Dalesa, a cool chic-blogger [and sexy might I add], and the all-too familiar topic was hinted at: “are men and women the same [when it comes to values, dating and desires]“?
The not-so-obvious answer is a resounding HELL NO!!
Men will all agree to this automatically (that the sex’s desires are polar opposite).
However, women tend to expect that both sexes should operate the same: emotionally, psychologically, behaviorally and literally.
When it comes to matters of sex, love, courtship, desires, relationships, dating, mating, passions, etc., women tend to believe that what they (women) want and expect, should be the same things men would want and expect.
Another misconception that women have about the sexes, is the belief that what goes for women- goes for men (and vice-versa).
Sure, that’s correct in the sense that we all should be given fair shakes in life.
I have no qualms with that.
But the belief of ‘sameness’ is so so false in relation to hooking up and dating.
As I was saying to Dalesa, “taking it slow”, is NOT a concept that men live by.
Men do not want to take it slow (generally) when it comes to banging some fine-ass chic he’d met last week.
The furthest thing from his mind is taking it slow.
He wants to progress towards sex as fast as humanly possible!
And that is where the sexes differ (in relation to the lead up towards banging).
Women are socially conditioned to want to take it slow (although they really don’t want to).
Men are socially deemed pussies if they take it slow. So that is 1 factor why we accelerate as fast as possible towards vagina-town.
Quite often, I’d comment on chic-blogs on the topic of dating, and the oft-familiar declaration which keeps repeating itself (through the commentary) is, “that should go for men too”.
Ladies; NO IT DOESN’T!!!
What goes for women (in dating) does NOT instinctively apply to men!
Both sexes have different sets of needs, desires and values.
This should be common knowledge by now.
Things in which women may view as weird, immoral, unethical, crazy, illogical…may just be another day at the office for us men.
For instance; cheating.
Women obviously take this sort of stuff very fucking seriously!
It’s the greatest act of betrayal under the friggin’ sun [for women that is]!
Do we men see cheating as such a big deal of betrayal?
Of course not!
It is an issue for us, but it isn’t tantamount to treason.
And this hearkens back to what I wrote some months ago, that men are biologically programmed to cheat.
Our value systems are totally different.
Machismo and bravado are things which women do not comprehend (for the obvious reasons that females are the submissive sex of the 2).
Therefore, saying to your hot hunk of beef, “you should act more docile, be less protective, get in touch with your feminine side”, etc. are things which do not compute to most men.
However, quite normal for women to expect, say and do.
Expecting your boyfriend to giddily cuddle and chat about your wonderful day @ work after ejaculating his little spermies, is just not a fun thing for him.
He’ll be more satisfied with dozing off or crawling out of bed to find something more stimulating to do.
Sure he can play along for a minute or 2, but he’s secretly saying to himself, “This chic cannot shut the fuck up”!!
Now, women may see this sort of stuff as pretty fucking insensitive and rude, that their husbands would rather be gambling with the fellas than to lie in bed for post-sex conversation.
For men though; this sort of anti-climactic mindset is quite routine.
Also, I’ve heard women say a lot, “How can someone (a man) cheat on his spouse (wife), and lie down with her afterwards”!?
Once again, this speaks to the differences of the value systems of the sexes: what women see as unfathomable, abominable and down-right nasty, to a guy’s value system, he may not see such act as nasty or punishable by death.
Overall, women need to grasp the differences in values between the 2 sexes, and rid themselves of the cliche-type notion that “what women do- men do”, “what goes for women- goes for men”.
Men (being the macho bastards we are), put more value on hanging out with the boys for New Years celebration, than to go on cheesy-ass dates with our GF’s awaiting the drop of the ball to reign in 2013.
•Women value cuddling.
•Men don’t give a rat’s ass about cuddling (generally).
•Women value post-sex conversation.
•Men just want to sleep after sex.
•Women value PDA.
•Men only want to perform PDA if there are other men around in order for him to guard his woman against other competing Alpha-Males.
•Women value foreplay.
•Men only do foreplay in order to get his cock erect (he’s not doing it for you).
•Women value jewelry.
•Men hate buying jewelry for their women (we only partake in this because of social pressure).
•Women love climaxing together.
•Men in general could care less about cumming together, nor about you (the girl) cumming at all. We just wanna cum!
•Women value the art of listening.
•Men hate to listen [our innate rebellious nature].
•Women hate other girls who cheat [although women cheat more].
•Men understand why other men cheat, and are empathetic to it.
So ladies, please desist from the delusions that what is important to you (as a woman), is equally important to him (as a man).
This is the root cause of 70% of the fights in relationships between the sexes: women seeming to believe that what goes for them- goes for men.
Make 2013 a year of new outlook on men and dating!
Sure men are insensitive assholes, but there’s a method to the madness.
Or go to the post: Vote your favorite PUA coach 2012