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This article may come off as self-bashing. But at times, every seductionist, lady’s man or player, needs a reality check when he begins to falter and drop points.
Something funny and familiar happened to me last night.
I was bored as shit, browsing through my phone contacts looking to call some chics to possibly come over or hang out with somewhere.
[Fore-note: The following 2 girls, I knew them from couple of weeks prior, and had hung out with them before on random occasions]
“What’s up ****? It’s your future husband”.
HB8: “Lol shut up. I know it’s you Kenny”!
Me :“Whatever! You cheated. What’s good for tonight”?
HB8: “Getting dress to go to town”.
Me: “Cool. There’s a basketball game @ ****. I’m gonna pass through”.
HB8: “And you didn’t tell me”?
Me: “Aight fine. Let’s meet there. I’ll call you when I’m ready”.
HB8: “Ok”.
Half hour later…
Ring, ring, ring…
Ring, ring, ring…
Ring, ring, ring…
“This’ ****, leave a message. I can’t come to the phone right now”.
Called her back 2 times within 5 minutes- no answer.
She was obviously screening out my calls to voice mail because she isn’t interested (anymore).
I laughed at the irony.
Had I been the average guy who didn’t know what’s up, I would’ve felt furious, rejected and hurt.
However, I smiled and said to myself, “I deserve this shit. I knew better”!
I called up another chic whom I had the chance to escalate on 2 days before:
Me: “Hey S****a”.
HB8: “Call me back in 20 minutes”.
Once again; I smiled and laughed at the irony.
This was a blatant blow off.
Same night, I went out to grab me a snack @ an ice cream parlor and ran into an old flame whom I hadn’t seen in 6 years (now lives in Canada, but is here in the islands for Christmas vacation).
The 10 minute chat outside of the parlor went super great!
BUT!!!
Instead of physically escalating and try to take her on an insta-date, then isolate her to a seduction location; I instead opted for getting her phone #.
Another step backwards for a veteran!
Other men may see this as a win [the fact that I got a #]. But it’s a loss in all reality.
She was feeling me THEN!
In the moment!
There is no guarantee that she’ll be feeling me whenever I do call her.
So why take that gamble guys?
In fact, there’s a 70 % chance that she will NOT be open to me on future occasions (from my experience).
Just as with the other 2 girls I’d phoned, I had the opportunity to escalate on them since I was chatting with them face to face.
For whatever reason (perhaps rust); I dropped the proverbial ball and decided to set up an official meet up over the phone instead [wrong move for a veteran like I am].
Quick Observation:
Most of the girls I’d fucked over the past years, had happened on random occasions.
Hardly any of those lays materialized out of a date or official meet-up.
Ninety percent of my lays occurred either via: ONS (One-Night Stands), SNL (Same-Night Lays) or just happened to bump into an acquaintant while running errands or sarging in the field.
So 90% of my f-closes (lays) were NOT planned!
The fact that I’d escalated, ramp up the flirtation level and led the girl to another location (i.e. insta-date), was the prime key to me banging those girls.
Moral of the story:
Leave nothing up to chance!
NADA!
You have to make a commitment to yourself that you will NOT get girls’ phone #’s from now on; no matter how tempted you are, and no matter how hot she is.
Getting girls’ phone #’s is a step in the wrong direction.
The primary reason I do # closes, is to showcase to my readers how to do it.
I mean, if you’re cool with collecting massive amounts of #’s in order to set up dates later on; then more power to you if that’s you’re modus operandi.
BUT!!!
If you want quick action, then the next girl you meet whom you like; try to fuck her then and there!
If you run into a girl whom you’ve known prior, whom you like; try to fuck her then and there!
And don’t be idiots guys! I don’t mean for you to whip the cock out right then and there on Broadway for the world to see, and for the cops to haul your ass off to the asylum!
When I say “fuck her then and there”, I mean for you to apply and utilize PUA tactics and techniques which will facilitate the chances of you getting to fuck the target that same night (but in the right location).
That means and requires:
*KINO ESCALATION (touching)
*FLIRT ESCALATION
*Reading her body language
*Turning her on
Escalating Sexually
Essentially, you’ll be turning her on on the spot!
How backwards is it to be face to face talking with a hot girl, she’s totally into you, then you let her off the hook by choosing to leave and call her at a later time to set up a date.
You essentially had her on a fucking date but failed to escalate!
Why should she give you another shot to meet up!!!?
Another shot to be a pussy and let her go home all hot and bothered!!!?
This is nonsense! And that is also why I do NOT advocate going on traditional dates (dinner-movie).
In Closing:
I knew better! And I knew that I fucked up with those 3 girls (all 3 within the span of 5 days)!
Knowing what to do and doing it are 2 different things.
I knew I could’ve fucked those 3 girls had I did what I’m teaching y’all to do right now.
However, as I mentioned in the latest episode of my PUA podcast show [#8]: we lose our skills with women over time.
The basics and fundamentals may slip away from you.
Just as the aging boxers knows what he needs to do to get the job done and win the fight. But he just cannot pull the trigger as accurately as when he was 22.
In this recent article sent to me by the most dangerous coach in the seduction community: Derek Rake, he wrote about how you can spot the girl’s sexual signals to know when she’s sexually aroused.
I’ve known of these signs for years [learned them from an article in Hustler porn magazine years ago]. But for guys who aren’t so fortunate, you can learn of these signs from Derek Rake’s article: Body-Language Seduction by the dangerous Derek Rake.
Overall guys; don’t fucking put all your eggs in 1 basket to bank on her accepting your phone call and accepting to meet up or go on a date with you.
Escalate on her the moment you approach and meet her for the 1st. time!
You have not 1 thing to lose!
The worst that can possibly happen from escalating is the girl walking away.
So fucking what LOL!!!
With skills and know-how, you can get her to not walk away (also by re-calibrating).
If she’s in a flirty frame and she’s visibly feeling you:
Then escalate!
Touch her!
Grab her!
Tug her (playfully)!
Push her (playfully)!
Hug her!
Attempt to kiss her!
Smell her (hair)!
Get close to her!
Move her (physically)!
Massage her!
Slap her (playfully)!
You get the point.
The operative word is PLAYFUL!!!
Flirting is Playful!!!
Playful leads to sex!!!
Do not make the mistake of opting out for her phone # in hopes of doing these things at a later date when you had the opportunity to do them now on the first meeting.
This also applies to women you meet at parties and nightclubs [I talk about it in this video: What should be your mindset when clubbing].
Fuck getting her phone #!
Your goal should be to escalate and fuck her that time- that night.
Think Jersey Shore and how The Situation and the guys would bounce chics back to their crib from the club.
They don’t go for phone #’s and try to call the girls another day.
They pull them back to the crib right from the club, boardwalk or bar, just like a skilled Pick-Up Artist should.
They KINO escalate on the girls and pull kiss closes in order to pump her buying temperature and get the girls horny.
And this has shit to do with fame, because before these guys had a name, they were pulling girls back to the crib on season 1 of MTV’s Jersey Shore.
Plus I’m not famous, and I pull chicks back to my PUA bachelor pad all the time.
Ciao!
Related links:
*Why men fail to escalate with women by Daygame Dating.
*Window of escalation by Chase Amante.
*Her phone # is just the beginning, podcast episode #5 by Socialkenny PUA [mp3 and iTunes downloadable].
*Either I’ll fuck her; or she’ll hate me by Socialkenny.
*The PUA guru, Steve Jabba, out of London (rated on my list of top PUA coaches of 2012), showcased how to escalate and kiss a random girl on the streets, as he approached and made out with a random chick [he amped her sexual state]:
*Socialkenny KINO’s with a random-stranger girl at the park:
This is an awesome post! I struggle with this constantly because it’s always easier to fall back on the low-risk way of getting numbers. But just like you said, often SHE FEELS YOU now. Take advantage of that high point. Even if you’re in a hurry to go to some important event, give her a kiss, do something edgy. Escalate then and there.
You made a huge point that I forgot to include which was to at least get something done in set before having to part ways.
Leaving the girl when she’s totally into you without even giving her a kiss is not the way to go. But like you said, it’s much easier to just fall back and work from the # close.
Tell me about it.
The easiest route is always the option we chose in those cases.
To escalate is always the hardest road to take especially for newbies man.
Yea tell me about it.
Even last night I had a brush with this again. I met up with a chic I knew from a while ago, we went on an insta date type thing but I escalated KINO and had a nice time. I didn’t go for her #.
Another hit for socialkenny. I have a question though. Here in germany, I believe that the girls are easier to escalate on but we men still chose to not push. Although I do believe that german men are more dominant than other,but we still display some unwilliness to escalate sooner.
What say you of that? I will wait your reply.
Guys in the eastern hemisphere seem to have the Alpha stuff more in check than in the west. Just as in Spain, I heard that those dudes are serious Alpha naturals when it comes to game.
And by the way steve jabba formerly of pua training is the fucking man. I’m surprised he has not responded to the acknowledgement as yet from you to him.
Could you imagine pulling off such a k close on the streets ? This is some powerful shit. And as Steve would tell you, it all boils down to body language and flirting and how to infuse the target with sexual tension. That’s if you know how to project that state in a girl Giacomo.
Mmm…I get it. Give a girl some time to think about it and she will probably change her mind. That’s what we do! That or she’s just being lazy and doesn’t wanna dress up.
Exactly! That is the message here. Give her time, and she’ll rethink, back out, change her mind, lose interest, etc. So get it while it’s hot and while she likes you. No telling if she’ll be feeling you when you do decide to call her. And from my experience 70% of the time, the girl won’t be feeling me still.
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Kenny
Nice post,i agree you have to see how far you can get,i remember myself a few years ago i would try to text or call the women after meeting them the night before oh my god lol they either didnt pick up or hung up on me i have a bunch of texts that i see on old phones that are one way from me lol and not answered…But again i think this would work even better if you are in a social circle that she feel comfortable in like you have a buddy and he also brings his girl back to apt that takes out the creep factor…
What’s up fellow New York gamer lol. Thanks for stopping by.
You mentioned a classic example of why we should escalate right away. Most men instinctively knows this, but it’s just to man up and do it (which isn’t that easy).
Also Icarus, you eluded to “state” as in mindset. If I meet a girl now and she’s “in state” (feeling me and attracted to me), there’s no guarantee she’ll be in that same state later on or any day.
Women are very pliable, meaning they jump from state to state real easily. She can hate you now, love you later. Head over heels for you now but hate your guts tomorrow.
So it’s a huge gamble whenever you do not escalate on a high point when she’s into you.
Thanks for commenting. I hope you get the issue fixed on your site.
Used to be like that after high school….now I’m the old boxer lol
You hit home with this comment dude. and what I am referring to is state and how HBs jump from 1 state to another. 1 minute she is aroused and the next she isnt.
This remind me of a HB9 I opened at a christmas shop last week. we hit it off very much well, I held her hands at intervals and really made a good impression on her. she showed every sign and SOI in the book that she was attracted. I n closed and got the digits phoned her 3 days later after some text game but the vibe was so fucking cold man I knew I fucked up. I knew I should gone on an instant date when we met initially and since I didn’t have much to do, but I took the number and focused on that instead. Guys can learn from our situations. But it’s not easy to escalate alt all believe that
We all know what to do but escalation isn’t the easiest thing in the world.
by the way kenny, you the 1 who posted this latest video to youtube your channel? Shit is crazy rotf
. Shit is like your new year resolutionn
@Japan PUA- Lol I have a post to add that video to at a later date (perhaps after new years). It was me and from me.
Hey Kenny – for whatever reason I wasn’t getting your updates in the WordPress Reader… It’s back now. Anyway, like the new look here – really nice.
Ok was wondering. Yea man, thanks. Everyone been saying they digging the new look. I was tired of the same-old look, so I did a bit of recreating.
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