I was browsing Coldman’s PUA Journey blog the other day and I came across an interesting post from Entropy, one of my favorite dating coaches/pick-up artist out of Boston. I learned a lot of game from this guy over the years.
At least 50% of your advances towards women should be rejected. If less than 50% are rejected, then you are not being aggressive enough.
Take a moment and think about that. The implications run pretty deep. This means that 50% of your approaches should be rejected, 50% of your attempts to kiss should be rejected, 50% of your phone numbers should flake, 50% of your attempts to get her into bed should be stopped.
Now you probably think I’m crazy. You WANT us to get rejected? Either that, or you’re saying something like, “Oh, way more than 50% of my advances are rejected, and it sucks.”
Here’s why the 50% rule is important: too many guys play it safe, too many guys aren’t aggressive enough. Too many guys wait for the “right” moment and end up passing up plenty of opportunities. If rejection didn’t matter, then you’d take every opportunity, right? That’s what we should be striving for. Let me provide just a few examples where the 50% Rule can come into play and seriously help a guy out.
A guy who always waits for the “perfect” moment to kiss a girl. He passes up tons of opportunities, but he never gets rejected either.
A guy who passes up approaching tons of attractive women because they have an iPod on, they’re in an elevator, they’re walking the other way, or they’re with other guys. He waits for women who he knows are easy to approach instead and avoids the rejection.
The guy who only calls phone numbers of girls he knows really liked him, not bothering with the women who seemed to give him their number out of politeness.
Not trying to bring a woman home because he doesn’t want to seem rude. Instead he waits for next time, when often there isn’t a next time (and often there isn’t because he didn’t take her to the bedroom!)
But going a level deeper, the 50% Rule doesn’t just condition a guy to become more aggressive, it’s a tool that guarantees constant improvement, because it applies to any guy, no matter what his experience level. Some guys get decent with women, and get to the point where they rarely approach but rarely get rejected, they rarely get turned down on kisses or sex, but they rarely try. This rule applies to me just as much as it applies to the next guy. If I’m able to pick up every woman I approach, then I’m doing something WRONG, not right. I’m not being aggressive enough. I’m playing it too safe, and I’m leaving a lot of opportunity on the table.
His main point was this: if a guy approaches 10 girls, he should expect to get rejected by 5 of them. If he gets rejected less, it obviously means he’s not approaching enough girls nor being aggressive enough.
It’s a #’s game.
The more women you approach, the greater the chances of being rejected. But also the greater the chances of getting laid more.
Oh, BTW you can check out the original article Here at Mark’s Practical Pick Up Blog. I learned a lot of game, skills and insights from him over the years. And check out his latest site PostMasculine, which gives practical lifestyle tips and dating insights for the average person. Cool blog.